Congratulations graduating class of 2014! As you begin your career, consider networking as a part of your professional resume.If done right, you can become a helpful, connector of people, services and products, and you may even get a job, build a business and be a leader as a result.
Connecting with people is fundamental. Positive connection to others or positive subjective experience is part of what Martin Seligman calls “The Good Life.” Positive connection relates to matters of deeper meaning or purpose in life. Networking is about creating positive connections with new people. Out of that network will grow purposeful relationships that will help your career and others’ careers as well.
For those that are introverted, networking can be a horrible experience. Honestly, it can be horrible for anyone. In order to get the most out of networking, follow these 5 rules:
- Listen. Networking is about sharing time and airspace. When you only talk about yourself, you don’t learn anything. You want to position yourself to be of service. Be curious, listen to their story, ask follow-up questions, and provide sincere acknowledgements, where appropriate. A client of mine recently had a networking meeting with a new acquaintance. The person said that she was working on her networking skills and wanted to be more curious. She then proceeded to talk for nearly 50 minutes and finally asked my client about her business. When my client responded, the networker redirected the conversation back her business.
- Kindness rules. It takes moxie and grit to attend networking events, walk up to strangers and to recite your value proposition over and over. Remember, it’s easy for very few people. When you are at an event and talking in a group, and another person joins that group to network, welcome them. That’s what you are there for, right? That person could be your next VP of Operations who needs a new Director. So many times, we attempt to join the group only to receive small but significant body language from others to say we are not welcome.
- Speaking of body language, watch yours. You want to convey a message of openness and confidence, not closed off or arrogant. Be aware of crossing your arms (unless it’s really cold in there), eye contact (not too much or too little), personal space, and posture (shoulders back). Breathe and really smile. (There’s a science behind real and fake smiles. A real smile will get you more positive interactions.)
- Know your strengths, goals, and purpose. Someone will ask you, “Why are you attending this networking event? “ Say, “Hi, I’m Sam. I’m interested in finding a position with a medium –sized company in Human Resources. I’m open to entry-level positions. I am passionate about helping organizations grow people.”
- Follow up appropriately. If you’ve promised a connection to someone, forward that information with a brief note. If you’ve received a lead from someone, thank them and follow-up on that lead ASAP. Thank someone for their time and that you enjoyed your conversation about XYZ. A note about LinkedIn: Connecting on LinkedIn is great follow-up, but please, please write a personal note on your invitation. If someone less experienced than you would like to connect, graciously accept or decline.
I hope you will find these rules helpful. Networking can be an amazing and energizing experience when done right. If not, it can be crushing. Just remember, it’s more about helping others than helping yourself. Rather, by helping others, you help yourself.
If you have any networking stories that you would like to share, I would love to hear them. Also, what skills do you use to help you network?